Tuesday, February 22, 2005

Ready or Not

6 weeks have passed and I feel not ready for what's about to happen to me. I've been preparing for the trip but I still havent made reservations, and I just realized yesterday that I over spent and I don't have money anymore.
Last night I remembered my past, how I was treated, how I was made a fool. All the negative thoughts and emotions started flooding me. No wonder I've been so negative about this coming event in my life, I've been programmed to expect the worst that's why I've been resisting the good that's about to happen, i.e. if there is really something good about to happen.
Heaven help me.

1 comment:

Cerridwen said...

ate fions cheer up, when youa re there and enjoying hi..it *wink* you will forget the rest of the crappy stuff that you went through. *sigh* am sooooooooooooooooo kilig for you!!! dont forget I will miss you and I will be waiting for the details, every bits and pieces of it...*hugs* and have a wonderful time!!!!